Summer and Joy

This is our first year of summer vacation with the kids, and as the girls are finishing the end of their preschool school year, I am finding myself filled with this happy tingle of anticipation. Normally the heat of Arkansas takes it all out of me, and I dread the long hot days ahead. But this year, as the days get warmer, I get more excited - flip flops, sprinklers, popsicles, pajama days, road trips, swimming, cucumbers, birthday parties (our little friends have a disproportionate number of summer birthdays)... and then, Kindergarten.

One of my favorite things about motherhood is the new eyes it has given me. I see every season and every holiday differently now, and it is such a JOY.

Christmases are more magical than they have ever been - a combination of the wonder of childhood Christmas with the deeper understanding of adult Christmas. Easter is more holy than it has ever been - this year in Sophia I saw the profound change that happens when you first fully realize what Jesus did for us, and I relived it myself. I've never been a big fan of Halloween (sorry) but I find myself starting to think about costumes in September and getting excited about carving jack-o-lanterns. And then there are those "little" holidays - Sophia told me the other day that she was really sad that St. Patrick's Day was so far off, because having green lemonade at Chick Fil A was her favorite thing EVER (so of course I whipped up a batch of green lemonade). I can't remember ever looking forward to 4th of July fireworks this much, but remembering how much the girls loved them last year - I can't wait!

Before I had kids, I often found myself looking ahead negatively at the season to come. Dreading the heat of summer, ice storms and Christmas shopping madness that comes with winter. But now, each season brings with it so much to look forward to.

I am counting down the days until Summer Vacation 2010 - we have a few trips planned, a couple of day camps and swimming lessons, but mostly we're looking forward to days of just sitting in the kiddie pool. Getting sticky on homemade ice cream and rinsing off in the sprinklers. The farmer's market. Taking Henry for his first swim. Spending a whole day with a pile of construction paper, some scissors, and a glue stick. Eating salads for dinner. Lemonade (green or otherwise).

And then, believe it or not, I'm already looking forward to the fall. I love the school where Sophia will be going in the fall, and rather than dreading the start of Kindergarten, I am so excited! Seeing her walk up those school steps in her little uniform, off to conquer the world, I will be so proud. This fall my brother (the one who got married last summer) and his wife will be having a baby, and I'm SO excited about that! It will be my kids' first cousin on my side of the family, and I can't wait for them to meet at Thanksgiving.

Sophia grabbed a box of red velvet cake mix at the grocery store and asked me whether she could make cupcakes by herself. I told her yes, and you would have thought she won the lottery. It's so much easier to find happiness in the small things, and to slow down and enjoy the moment, when you have little kids around.

I am so thankful for these new eyes. I'm thankful to my children for helping me remember what pure anticipation feels like. I'm thankful that I am being reminded that each day is a gift. When Sophia was a baby, I prayed all the time (and I still do) that I would be able to see the world through their eyes - that I remember what it was like to be four years old. I wanted to remember so that I could be a better mother to them, but I'm learning now that I'm the one who is truly benefiting from this new perspective. Sure, I might be a little more patient or understanding, but mostly I'm just filled with more JOY.