Dream Job

I'm just going to go ahead and say it... I was an awesome babysitter when I was a teen. I was dependable - I always showed up, and a few minutes early too. Kids loved me, because I got down on the ground and played with them and read books to them and colored with them. They never watched TV or got bored when I was around. I made cute snacks and cooked healthy dinners. I jumped at the chance to change a diaper, even a stinky one. And when the kids went to bed, I cleaned - I kept cleaning (stove-scrubbing cleaning) until their parents got home, just because I wanted to and I didn't feel right getting paid just to sit around.

And while I was changing diapers and playing and straightening up and tucking in and cooking and cleaning and folding laundry, I daydreamed about being a mom. Not in a creepy Lifetime-movie-nanny way, but I would think about being the mother - how I would love it, how it would be the best thing ever. I always knew I would have a career, mostly because no other option was ever allowed to enter my mind growing up, but when I really fantasized about my life as an adult, it was the job of MOTHER that preoccupied my mind. I had it all figured out - how many kids I would have, what I would name them, how I would discipline, get them to sleep, what kinds of toys I would and would not buy them, what our house rules would be. Ha ha ha ha ha! That part was funny.

But what stands out to me now, looking back, was how I knew back then that motherhood was the most important, wonderful job on earth. I knew it was a privilege. I knew children were so precious, and getting one of your very own was just about the most special thing that could ever happen. And I knew how sacred the job of mothering was - how no one could ever replace you, no one else could do what you do, everything you did affected your child's life, and how deliberate and careful you should be with this responsibility. Most of all, I saw it as something AWESOME.

Now, I am so honored, so happy, so very very lucky that I was given this job. But sometimes I forget. Last night, as I thought about Mother's Day and what kind of mother I was and what kind of mother I wanted to be, I prayed. I want to be a more patient mother. And today, God decided to make sure I really meant it. My children fought to the point of drawing blood - each other's and at one point mine. One screamed in the middle of church (NOT the baby). One of my three year old Sunday School kids picked up a figure of Jesus and pretended to shoot his classmates with it. The girls decided to ignore every word that came out of my mouth all day long. Meanwhile, I forgot my iPhone on top of my car and it flew off the truck as I raced to church, along with a series of other mishaps throughout the day. I tried so hard, but I yelled and scolded and cried and threw my arms up. I certainly did not cherish changing four stinky diapers on one rash-plagued little boy. I didn't stop folding laundry to sit and play with my kids. I was grouchy about straightening up the house. I felt queasy and tired and let it get me down.

But, this is the most important job in the world. It deserves my very best. I pride myself on being a good employee, on always doing more than is being asked of me, of being dependable. I would never tell a client or a boss "just a minute" if asked to do something. When I am at work, I focus on the tasks I have to do, and even if I hate them, I don't let others know. And as much as I take my role as financial provider for my family seriously, that is just a job. There is a much, much more important job that deserves even MORE of me.

Not only is motherhood the most important job I will ever have, it is also my dream job. This is the job I have been waiting for, dreaming of, preparing for. This is my one shot to do it right, joyfully, dutifully, thankfully.

Happy Mother's Day! So many of you are the mothers who inspire me to be better, and I thank you for that!!